A not so happy ending!

As I fight back the tears to prove my strength to him, on the inside my stomach is twisting. The words I'm searching for? I hate you!

"Danika you've become my best friend"

I want more than that, & I don't think I can sit back pretending that I don't.

I'm the girl who is everyones friend.

"Dan you have such an amazing personality and one day you're going to meet an amazing guy who will just be the luckiest guy on earth to be with you"... Thanks for the words of inspiration. Don't suppose you'd care to give me any insight as to why you don't desire to be that lucky guy?

Tonight for the first time in a very long time I felt completely alone...

...............This is not the ending I had written in my head.................

Reality Vs Expectations!

My expectations were High

The reality was low,

it's as simple as that

I guess this helps me grow.

He looks at me with love

but never does he act,

don't think I'll ever be good enough

and have to live with that.

I know I make him laugh

I definitely make him smile,

So what the fuck is up

just be with me for a while.

I fell in love once

I promised never more,

the hurt that he left me with

was so much more than sore.

And here I am again

loving with all my might,

unfortunately this time

I'm not strong enough for the fight!

I Hate Magicians...

So it turns out as magically as he was able mend my heart he quickly managed to break it again. I guess this was to ensure it was left exactly the way he found it? kind of like when they chop up the woman in the box & then put her back together again... top job magician... !

I should have written it all down...

Underneath the ANGER is HURT,

But underneath the HURT is LOVE...

I learnt that a few years back, I think I must have forgotten....

I was reminded again today!

Q & A

when someone says "what if it doesn't work out?"

Reply with "what if it does?"

When someone says "why?"

Reply with "why not?"

When someone says "I don't think I can"

Reply with "I do"

When someone says "maybe it's just meant to be"

Reply with, "nothing is meant to be unless you want it to be"

It's harder to get by on your own, listen to other people, accept compliments & as much as it's gonna sting you in the guts... be positive... or at least try...

The Magician came to town

I once had a boy who broke my heart. In fact he more than broke my heart, he left it with a scar tissue so deep that I thought it'd be there forever, hideous and raw for everyone to see.

Like all scars I learnt to live with it, forget it's there until someone mentions it and you remember for a moment how you got it. This is the way it was until I met the other boy. The other boy who turned out to be a magician... He asked me if I had only one wish what it would be, and I replied "to make this scar go away" & so he did. He healed my scar and my heart started to beat again. I hope some day I can repay the Magician boy, at the least I hope he lets me...